I feel like I'm in dance class right now
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
Randomize