Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
