I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize
