omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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