I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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