Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I just want nice things and good sex
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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