I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize
