Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
