I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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