My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
