this beer tastes like vomit already
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Randomize
