Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
