Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
We need to get me chipped asap
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
Randomize
