yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
operation have a gay friend backfired
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
