Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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