Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize