It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
