its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize