Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Randomize
