I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Pants are for mortals
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
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