Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
