ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
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