I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
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