Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
