I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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