me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
