then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
