Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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