I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Randomize
