areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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