..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Randomize
