im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
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