Non-Jews are for practice
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
Randomize
