the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
