i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Randomize
