When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Randomize