I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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