Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Randomize
