love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
