do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
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