fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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