I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
