the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
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