Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
