I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
