Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
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