have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
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