...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Randomize
