No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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