I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
id be glad to
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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